There’s a strange guilt that sometimes creeps in when you start growing.
When your priorities shift.
When your circle tightens.
When the things that used to excite you now feel draining.
When your “yes” becomes “no,” and your “maybe” becomes “not anymore.”
Suddenly, you’re made to feel like the problem. Like you think you’re better than everyone else. Like you’ve changed—and truth be told, you have.
But isn’t that the point?
Why do we apologize for becoming the person we prayed to become?
Why do we feel the need to explain why we no longer fit where we used to?
Let me say it plainly: God didn’t bring you this far for you to stay the same.
Growth Will Cost You Familiarity
We love comfort. We cling to routine. We stay loyal to environments that no longer serve us—sometimes out of fear, sometimes out of guilt, sometimes out of history.
But growth isn’t always comfortable. It’s not always tidy. It often requires distance, reflection, and hard conversations. It means outgrowing spaces that once felt like home.
And here’s the part no one really talks about:
You can still love people and know they’re no longer aligned with your next chapter.
That doesn’t make you arrogant. It makes you aware.
Jesus Grew—and Moved Differently
Scripture tells us, “And Jesus grew in wisdom and stature, and in favor with God and man.” (Luke 2:52, NIV)
Even Jesus grew. And with growth came purpose. With purpose came movement. He didn’t stay in the synagogue as a young boy. He didn’t remain in the place where they said, “Isn’t this Joseph’s son?”
He moved forward, even when others couldn’t see who He was becoming.
Why, then, do we assume that spiritual growth should be palatable to everyone in our lives?
You’re Not Leaving People—You’re Answering Purpose
If you’ve been wrestling with feeling bad about setting boundaries, changing directions, or simply growing in your walk with God and your goals in life, let this be your permission slip:
Stop apologizing.
You’re not obligated to shrink so others can feel tall.
You’re not required to explain your evolution to people committed to misunderstanding it.
You’re not abandoning people—you’re just responding to the call of your future.
And yes, it can feel lonely. But loneliness is often the hallway between who you were and who you’re becoming.
Shame Has No Place in Your Next Season
Growth and guilt can’t occupy the same space. One will always silence the other.
Shame wants to keep you tethered to who you used to be. Growth invites you to embrace who God is molding you to be.
It’s time to stop watering dead plants.
It’s time to stop replaying old conversations in your mind.
It’s time to stop apologizing for becoming healthy, whole, discerning, and wise.
God is not in the business of stagnation.
And neither are you.
Closing Thought
Some people will never understand why you had to go. And that’s okay. Growth isn’t always explained—it’s experienced.
Let your life be the fruit.
Let your peace be the proof.
Let your becoming speak louder than your explanations.
And the next time someone asks, “You’ve changed,”
Smile and say, “Yes, thank God I have.”
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